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I found myself fascinated with the idea that non-monogamy could be liberating rather than soul-destroying.

When I considered how I felt whenever I got jealous, I realized that a lot of it stemmed from insecurity rather than love.

Martin argues that, contrary to popular opinion, women often get bored with monogamy even faster than men.“Huh,” I thought, “I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a love like this before.I can’t think of a single instance in which I put the needs of someone else above my own.” I wondered if that, in a weird way, was the kind of selfless love my friend was talking about.I never thought of myself as the kind of person who could be in an open relationship.The way I love has always been passionate and all-consuming—I give myself over to someone entirely, and I expect the same from them.

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